When Aaron got home, Jamie was sitting on her bed and glaring. He did his best to paste an innocent look on his face, but it didn't really help. He had three hickeys on his neck and questionable-looking stains on the knees of his leather pants, so innocence really didn't factor into it all.

"Where have you been?" Jamie spat. "Its noon. You told me you'd be back by five."

Aaron shrugged. "I didn't specify morning or evening. So if you think about it, I'm really early."

It looks couldn't kill, Jamie's look wouldn't kill him. That would be far too kind. "Your mom called. I had to tell her you were in the shower. For three hours."

"Sorry."

"She kept talking about the possiblity of a double tour. And then she asked if she could manage me."

Aaron cringed. Now he really was sorry. "I'm so fucking sorry, Jamie. I promise I'll make it up to you."

She let him suffer a little longer, then sighed. "You'd better. This is worth at least a 7th Heaven guest spot."

"Oh, cruel mistress." Aaron clutched his heart and bellyflopped onto the bed next to her.

"So, tell me what happened after I left. Did those two blond boys have sex in the corner? Cause I totally thought they were going to."

Aaron blushed. "Um..."

"Britney dragged me off before anything really happened. And then she made me sit with the limo driver while she and Simon made out in the backseat."

"Simon who?"

"Simon Rex. You know, from that crappy show JC was on? Apparently somebody told her he did porn." Jamie gave Aaron the evil eye. "After he left this morning she borrowed my computer so she could order it from England. Ugh." Jamie shuddered. "Anyway. What did you do?"

"Had sex in a corner?"

Jamie's mouth slid open. "That was you?" She jumped off the bed, shrieking and rubbing her eyes. "Ew! Ew! I checked out your butt!"

"What?"

"Well...Britney thinks its weird that I'm twelve and I still haven't kissed anybody--cause when she was my age she was already making out with Justin and Christina, you know?" Aaron nodded. "So she asked me to point out a cute boy, and..."

"And your cute boy was me?" Aaron seemed to be far, far too amused by this.

"Shut up. Its just because you looked young and you were busy with someone else, so she couldn't try to force me to make out with you. Besides, I thought you were a prostitute from behind, and Britney doesn't support hooking up with prostitutes."

"But she sleeps with porn stars?"

Jamie shrugged.

"And fuck you, I didn't look like a whore! Why did everyone keep saying that?" Aaron moaned, rolling onto his back.

Jamie came and sat on the bed next to him, patting his forehead sympathetically. "Sweetie, you're a big whore. Deal with it." Aaron scowled at her, and she smiled sweetly back. "So, who were you making out with?"

Aaron shrugged.

"Wait. Does this have anything to do with those drinks you kept bringing to Ryan Gosling? The ones with lots of vodka in them?"

Aaron's eyes were shut, but he was smiling.

"Aaron!" Jamie smacked him on the stomach, ignoring his 'ow!' "I thought you were going after Michael Pitt."

"I am. This was just...a pleasant detour."

"A pleasant detour? Aaron, a pleasant detour is stopping to get donuts on your way to a concert. Sex at a party is not a pleasant detour."

"It wasn't sex," Aaron said. "It was just a blowjob. And a handjob. And then another blowjob. But it was in a bathroom, so it doesn't count." Jamie was staring at him incredulously. "What?"

"And you really think he's gonna want to introduce you to his friend now?"

"Yeah. For one thing, if he thinks I wanna date him, this'll divert me. And also, if he doesn't introduce me, I can threaten him with legal action. I think he got some cum on my shirt." Aaron examined the shirt in question, then pointed to a stain on the hem. "Yep. See that?" he said, holding the shirt out to Jamie, who shrank back.

"Ew! Wash that!" When he smirked and lay back down, Jamie settled next to him again, eyeing him warily. "So, you slept with him, and now you're going to blackmail him into helping you sleep with somebody else."

"Yep, thats about it."

"You do realize you're pure evil, right?"

"Oh, shut up." Aaron rolled over, eyes closing. "It okay if I sleep here, Jame?"

"I guess. But only if you take that shirt off. Hey!" She poked him, but it was to no avail. He was fast asleep. And the stained section of his shirt was beneath him, on Jamie's bed.

"Ew."

Jamie sighed and settled next to him, resigning herself to the fact that she was going to have to wash her new sheets when she woke up.

Shiny Tops and Soda Pops: Part Five