Now
*
[Sex. Sexsexsexsex.]
~*~
"How long are you in the city for, then?"
Ange looked up from the pillow, actually raising his head a little bit. The question surprised him, obviously, and it hurt Pete to think that he was honestly surprised that Pete would ask.
"A while." Ange laid back down, and shifted his legs under the sheets. Carefully, he asked, "Why you asking?"
"Because I am." He opened his mouth to say something more, but couldn't.
Ange felt his hesitation. "That's not much of an answer, hombre."
Pete chuckled sadly. "It's not much of a question, either, really."
Angelo rolled over and kissed him on the shoulder, tucking a hand around after his lips. He sighed comfortably, and replied, "No, guess not."
Pete listened to Ange's regular breath for a few minutes. He said, quietly enough that, if Ange were asleep he wouldn't disturb him, "Would you rather I hadn't asked?"
There was the muffled answer, coming from somewhere near his collarbone. It was a definite negative.
Though he wouldn't admit it to anyone, it made him smile.
~*~
Then
*
"You don't talk very much, do you?"
<<Shouldn't be surprising...>>
"Why not?"
<<I just... I don't talk unless I've got something to say, and a reason to say it.>>
"Fair enough."
Pete sat on the steps, watching Angelo scale the side of the building with a harness wrapped tightly around his flexible frame. Jono was belaying for him. Emma had sanctioned this little activity, because she was all for allowing Angelo whatever kind of actual physical exersise he'd actually voluntarily get into.
Pete had also taken the idea to her without explaining why they'd be learning to scale brick instead of granite.
'Rock climbing practise, Em. I'll watch'em, you know I will. I've done this sort of training for years.'
Pete snorted. Right. She bought the excuse, or didn't want to argue, though, so who was he to complain?
Monet had declined this activity as being beneath her -- 'Why climb when I can fly? It's a wasteful use of energy' -- but Ev and Jubilee were going to be coming 'round shortly to harness up themselves. A few of the other students, normal kids, had expressed an interest, and with a pained expression, Pete had told them to talk to Em about it.
She had scheduled them all some time on the new 'climbing wall'. Pete had groaned and taken it.
He called out to Angelo, "You've almost got it -- few more feet and you're at the chimney!"
Ange swung a leg up more, flexing it like no normal human could, in order to reach the next makeshift foothold Pete had put there. Finally hauling himself up to the roof, he yelled, "I'm up!"
Pete yelled back, "Awright, mate! Repel down. Ev's up."
Quickly, Ange scaled back down the building, and unclipped himself from the rope. Later on, Pete would show them how to lay their own rope, and how to do all of this at night... but that would have to wait until they could be quiet enough not to wake anyone else up.
Angelo wiped his face with a towel, and said to Pete, "I can't believe Emma's letting us do all this stuff. She has to know what you're doing."
Pete shrugged, while Jono said, <<She probably does. Obviously she doesn't care.>>
Ange spied Ev and Jubilee come bursting out the doors, and sat down. He took a sip of water. Pete said, "Ange, you looked good up there, mate."
He tried not to go red, and covered it up by saying, "I felt like Spiderman."
Pete grinned. "Spiderman's not as built as you."
* * *
* * *
"I just can't do it, Pete. Forget it."
Pete put a hand on Angelo's shoulder, and peered over it. He was currently staring at satellite pictures of somewhere in what was Russia... there was a dark splotch, and the littler dots off in the distance--
"It's a base, probably for warheads. Where's the other shot?" Angelo handed him the other photo, and he squinted. "Yep. Been there, too, I think."
Angelo sighed in frustration, and leaned back in his chair. "How can you *do* that so quickly!"
Pete patted his arm again. "Hey, I've had years to learn this shite. Give yourself a break."
Angelo tossed the pictures aside in disgust. They slid across the table, to land on a pile of similar satellite images. They'd been staring at different places all over the globe for almost an hour now, and Ange was just barely catching the contour lines of the earth. Pete seriously doubted that he'd get it today... but then, they'd only been working on it two days.
*Now hasn't teaching taught you patience, Mr. Wisdom,* Pete thought.
Jono looked up from the other table, and grinned in his odd, lack-of-mouth way. <<Ange, mate, I can't even get past step one on this, so don't worry. You're ahead of me.>>
Ange grinned despite himself. Ahead of Jono wasn't somewhere he found himself often. "That's right," Pete added. "You're doing better than the Brit there." He frowned, and then said, "Why don't you two trade? I'll show Jono there this shite, and you try and reassemble that, Ange."
Ange stood up and stretched, and suppressed the envy that had started to build up. Just because Pete had decided to focus on Jono instead of him, didn't mean he was being given up on. He said, Ange was doing better than Jono at the moment, anyway.
He trudged over to the table where various electronic parts were strewn, and stared at them, hard. Maybe if he--
Jono patted him on the shoulder, and said gamely, <<Good luck, Ange. I hate those things already.>> Ange groaned.
This hadn't been as fun as they'd first thought it would be, but it was satisfying, in a strange way. Pete was actually paying attention, and showing them what to do. Seeing as how they were the only two students in this very un-authorized experimental teaching venture, that wasn't too hard of him to do. But still... it was nice.
"Don't be too hard on him, Jono."
Two grins answered him. He stared back down at the table, and got to work. Something had to fit together... he just had to FIND it.
* * *
His hand rests on my shoulder, a little longer than it should. Jono has his eyes averted, just like always. He's a good guy, a good friend. I remember the 'talk' we had. Ever since then, he hasn't pushed it, hasn't brought it up. It's like an unspoken rule... *I'll* decide when it's time.
I appreciate that he's willing to leave it be, and yet at the same time, listen to me whine in general when things aren't going my way. 'He's being such a prick,'... 'He's been gone for three weeks,'.... 'I can't talk to Jubilee'....
He's a good friend. He stands up, muttering in our heads about forgetting something, and quietly shuts the door behind him. I know he'll warn me before opening it, and I appreciate it more than he'll ever know.
Well, maybe he knows, but I'm grateful anyway.
I kiss Pete's hand, and it leaves it's resting place in a hurry. I look up, and his face is startled, but pleased as well. I smile, and pull him down for another kiss. It's slow, and not as needy as before.
We had sex last night. Neither of us is feeling the urge as strongly as when he was off in Prague.
<<Ange, mate, head's up.>>
We break apart, and resume our stances before the door was shut. Only this time, Pete's hand is draped in a friendly way on my shoulders, and his fingers are just barely touching my chest.
It's casual. It could be just a friendly thing. But Jono knows better.
He's a good friend because he's willing to pretend he doesn't.
* * *
"Emma asked about you this afternoon."
Angelo looks up, startled. There's that tone again, in Pete, that says warning. And sets him on edge.
"What did I do?"
"I don't know."
Pete was leaning, casual, but the wrinkles that so often say 'worry' were creased into his face. Ange felt his stomach tilt a little.
"Did you tell anyone about this?"
Immediate hostility. "Of course not! For Pete's sake-- god, I'm making bad jokes even... look. Just, no."
Pete's hand comes to rest on his shoulder. It says nothing to him. He can't hear it speak. He moves a little farther away, wanting to be resentful of the lack of trust.
"Ange. It was just a question."
"Right."
Somewhere in his insides, Ange's stomach protests. But his mouth stays shut.
In front of his eyes and three inches down, Pete's thins, turns a thoughtful, considering line. Lighter brown eyes regard him quietly.
When he speaks, it's not much. It's never much. Pete is a man of habits. "You know this is up to you, right, kid?"
On the other hand, there's no point to trying to predict him.
Ange blinks.
There's a shrug at the way his mouth opens, closes, seeks something relevant he actually wants to ask. "Yer the one with something ter lose here, Espinosa," and his accent turns that small bit more audible, caught on an edge of impatience. "I got no roots here. I've got roots much older than you. They stretch longer."
And he wants to say, but isn't this a two-people thing? And he wants to say, if this is just me in here, what does that mean? And he wants to say, I know this isn't a love story. I've never tried to decide what it is. But you've gotta give me something.
Some people don't give easy. This is another thing something deep inside him wants, desperately, to learn.
Osmosis.
He says, "I know." Because he knows how to lie. And he says, "I'll talk to Frosty." Because some things you've gotta hold your head high and face, and that he also knows.
And he knows how to run away, and he considers to, turns to the door, stares at a handle. The color is chipped there, strained with te touch of too many hands, the passage of too many bodies.
But. There are some things he hasn't learned yet, and he has to ask this. "Am I just wanking off, then?"
He wants to think that Pete flinched when he said it, but there's no way to check.
He's just trying to learn, right?
Pete mumbles, "I dunno, kid." Because he knows how to lie too.
He says, again, "I'll talk to her." Something numb in him detects the lie, dissects it, comes up empty.
And Pete says, and this time too there is no way to guess it coming, "Is this something you want?"
And saying, 'I don't know. I've never been here before. I'm only eighteen. How should I know?' is as much an excuse as it's ever been. And Ange sighs, and feels helpless and hopeless, and swallows again. Because whatever he says will be a lie.
So he just says, "Yeah." And wonders if that's even close to enough.
*