There's a saying that everything good comes in a small package. Bollocks to that, we said, and created a fucking monster.
Lise: You're the one who's got the talent, remember? I'm
just along for the ride.
River: I'll drown you and get me a cyber-soul who doesn't say bullshit
like that, I'm warning you.
Lise: Shutup and write something witty.
River: Like what? Tiny bios? Apologies for public trauma?
Lise: Either. Or. Stories of creation. Stories of destruction.
We'd like to apologize, first and foremost, for any public trauma we might have inflicted during the creation of this monster. It was a long, hard road, and we know it, and it was a long hard road for everyone who listened to us bitch about it.
We mostly bitched at each other, though. That's the great plus of having a co-author.
Yeah, beloved friends and people who just happened to be around, that's exactly what this means. We were whining three times the amount of time you were aware of.
We'd also like to apologize for any excessive swearing done in the course of this story. Not that Pete Wisdom and Angelo Espinosa shagging doesn't more than make up for corrupting the kiddies and exposing youngsters to fun terms like 'rat's balls', 'motherfucking pink elephants', and 'bint'.
This may be hard to believe, but the whole of this story was written while completely sober.
It's not nearly as hard for you to believe as it is for us.
This started, late one night, while we were discussing who should be shagging. It was a case of the universal hat-shaker saying 'awright, yeah, sex should be had. So, write some'. And we complied. We took two random characters and hooked them up. ...they're still coming.
Lise is a Canadian student, slasher, and all-around useful person, who started this out as a Pete-girl. They are no longer on speaking terms, although he has been appointed her spirit animal and is probably shagging her not-really-avatar. Don't ask.
River: I just found the term 'groin muscles' in a story
for, do you know, the first time ever.
Lise: --you are so weird.
River is in the army, not allowed to carry a gun, and we're probably grateful. She started this out as a Jubilee/Angelo supporter, who still hasn't really gotten over finding out that Jake Gavin Jr. is her spirit animal, and that telepathy can wake one up in the middle of the night and start one thinking about Dumbo slash. Don't ask.
Final thoughts: If we'd known that this was going to turn out the way it did, it's bloody likely one or both of us would have stabbed our eyes out. But some things just turn out this way.